It's Enough.......

 

Thank you Oprah for allowing us to recognize the "AHA" moments in our lives.

 

As I worked frantically over the weekend to pack for a return trip to Tennessee, reclaim the home so the Realtors could show it when I wasn’t in Georgia, feed pets and husband, and work on final items for the Nashville Christmas Show, I truly felt like I was spinning my wheels.  The past year I have been diagnosed with cancer, two surgeries, and radiation treatment plus meds I am on every day.  We also purchased and redid the home in Georgia that we are now looking to sell due to job changes for my husband.  I have the opportunity to be in Tennessee for less than a week, during which time, I need to schedule a trip to Knoxville to have the current car serviced, two hours each way, and then a trip to Cookeville to pick up the new vehicle.  I also have several people we have invited for Thanksgiving in a few weeks.  There may be overnight lodging involved in this event.  Did I mention, we redid the home in Tennessee also this year, and it’s not completely company ready?  At 9 a.m. it occurred to me that perhaps this was all just an exercise in insanity, and I needed to stop the bus or just get off the bus.  When I talked to the lady doing the show and she had such a short window for me to drop off items for the show and it would be a Nashville drop off when I would be in Georgia, I just realized that this is totally impossible and just completely nuts!  The world is not going to stop because I don’t have twenty items at the Nashville Christmas Show this year.  We, thank God, are not going to go hungry if I don't sell one thing.  Hopefully, there will be plenty of other holidays in my future and my loved ones.  Why should I make another weekend, day or hour such a forced march?  I looked around and there was nobody with a gun to my head.  Everything I was feeling was another way for the perfectionist in me, the performer, the creator, to beat me up with.  I feel that I have been on a journey to work minimalism into my life, and where was I failing?  You have to get it straight in your head first.

People don’t really need more things, even my lovely (LOL) items, and if they do, why can’t I sell this on my website, etsy, or in one of the several daily retail locations I have access to?  I was still able to provide forty handmade ornaments for Catherine, along with my studio information for inclusion in her boutique bags. I also worked on an ornament for the Tennessee Governor's Holiday Christmas Tree for our county.   Maybe for this year, this will be enough.  This reality has given me such a feeling of peace, I can’t explain it.  I know I will still finish my items and market them thru different channels.  I know we will still open our home and our hearts on Thanksgiving to our friends and family.  I know that this time next week I will be driving a new car back to Georgia, and you know what?  I know that tomorrow if it is God's plan, I will wake up healthy and full of optimism and hope.  And you know what?  It’s enough..